W I D E

I would like to make a couple disclaimers before I write this post:
1) I am surly, bitchy, witchy, exhausted, mean, mad and every other pissed off word you can think of today. Several reasons why, nothing I am willing to share (except that half of it is hormone related), but hang in there with me.

2) I was fat for a long time. No one ever said it to my face and sometimes I wish someone had. Maybe in a nice way, maybe in a mean way, I think it would have kicked my butt into gear faster. I believe you have to be very close to someone to tell them they are overweight. I make sure my kids do not comment on people's body shape.

3) I am the first one to admit that my kids do things that are wrong. If there is a scuffle or argument, I believe my kid is the root of it, until I hear otherwise. I believe them when they tell me what happened but I do not ever think my kids are angels.

So here was my day today:

Daughter sprung a last minute trip to the pool with her friend in tow. Middle boy didn't want to go, had to make arrangements for him to stay with neighbor to play. I didn't plan to go to the pool because we have Youngest's Social Skills group here Weds afternoon and I am frantically cleaning and putting away anything I think a Mid Level Autistic kid could use as a weapon. Didn't get that done because we were at the pool, still have a day and a half to do it. Breathe...

We have been going to the pool for years and Youngest has been on his own there for two years now. He has never had an issue with ANYONE and if anything, has made more friends than I have on Facebook. He just has to come back to our towel at break. And he does.

I had to use the restroom today, and I didn't get a chance to tell him over the rushing water of the giant bucket that drops on them. I was gone for maybe 4 minutes and I come back and a mom is having a very serious conversation with my son and her two kids. I can see the look of panic on his face as he is looking around for me, but I let him deal with it on his own. I had a book to read.

At break, I asked him what happened and he hemmed and hawed and finally told me that they were calling him an "idiot". Nothing gets my ire up more than a kid being mean to any of my kids. I asked if he yelled at them and he said "no", I asked if he hit them and he said "no". He said one of the kids shoved him so hard he almost fell off the water thing and then he told the one girl she was "too wide" to go down the little slide. Here's where the real fight starts.

I know my kid, he was not making the "too wide" comment as an insult, to him, it was fact. Here's where I get nasty: the mom was grossly overweight, as were her kids. This makes me mad on so many levels, but I won't go all Michelle Obama on you. I am running out of steam. You cannot force a 150 lb fish into a 85 lb tube. It just doesn't work. It's not insult, it is physics. And I know nothing of physics.

Youngest was so upset by the exchange that I swore at that moment that if that mom came at me, I would take her out then and there at the kiddie pool. That would have been fun to watch, I am sure.

I don't think there is a moral to this story, I am too tired to be morally entertaining. This is the crap I deal with daily. Sometimes I handle it well, sometimes I tell my kids to punch people. Sometimes I want to punch people.

Have a great Monday, folks!!

Cat

Homecoming

I am happy to report Middle child is coming home tomorrow. Though he had a rough start to his trip, he turned a corner earlier in the week and has been having a great time. We all miss him like crazy but I am relieved he is having a good time. But I want him home.

I have noticed a couple things in his absence:

*Today was the first day I had to do laundry since he has been away. That leads me to believe either me and Youngest have had the same clothes on for 6 days, or Middle generates a lot of laundry.

*I still have snacks in the house.

*The front door does not open and close 150 times a day.

*We have not had frozen pizza for dinner at all this week. Or for lunch. Or for breakfast.

*Daughter senses my sadness and has been extra silly this week. I am grateful she is a dork.

*I am not up to date with all things sports related. NBA finals, what??? Stanley Cup, who??

*Youngest can actually do the same things Middle can do when asked. With a lot less lip.

*Dogs can be sad. Teddy has been moping around all week, which makes me rub his tummy a little more. Maybe he is playing me...

*It's just so quiet. Apparently I thrive on noise. Who knew?

*I have realized what a great kid and friend he is. Things have not been the same in the court since he left. I am too hard on him and an working to be softer with him. I expect a lot out of him and always have, maybe it is time to back off a little.

All things will be right in my world when he gets home tomorrow. I am so grateful to the family that took him on vacation. This was truly a trip of a lifetime for a ten year old. Buck up neighbors: Middle child will be home to organize neighborhood chaos in 24 hours!! Please don't send your sad faced kids over here looking for him before then, I can't take it!

Be well.

Cat

Having an only child (of sorts)

It has been a bit of a tough couple days as Middle child is on vacation with friends from Friday till Friday. What makes it more difficult was that he was having a tough time missing us and his friends and it was hard and sad to hear him so down on the phone. This is a great opportunity for him and I am relieved to say that when we talked to him yesterday, he was much more himself and sounded like he was finally having fun.

 I am glad he is not our only child.

I had a tough time getting pregnant with Middle child but had a decent pregnancy, a surprising 10lb baby, and a wonderful infant. He was so good, that we decided to try for another one right away. I had a couple moments of "Do we want to really have another one? That would make three kids, though Daughter is only with us part time, I have one of each and that should be enough, right? And when Daughter isn't around, there would only be 3 of us and that is a weird number for amusement park rides and dinner reservations, right?" I clearly didn't do the math and realize if we had another baby, total we would be 5, an odd number.

I got pregnant 10 months after Middle was born.

It was clear early on that Youngest would be a challenge. He wasn't fussy or evil, just quiet and distant. We all know how this story goes, so I won't relieve any of it. I do want to point out: some times when I wish Middle was an only child (but with Daughter in tow, too. Confused yet?)

1)At the grocery store: Daughter walking along the Car Cart, Middle in the seat of the Car Cart, Youngest in his bucket seat in the cart, making it impossible to actually put groceries INTO the cart. Not to mention having to switch everyone at checkout to the normal carts. UGH.

2)Two boys in diapers at the same time.

3)Having to lug an active Middle child to Youngest's therapy appointments. It was ME who needed therapy after months of that.

4)Riding rides at State Fairs: someone is always with a weird stranger.

There were a lot of dark times with Youngest when I really pondered what life would be like without one of the boys. This week I got a dose of it. I don't like it.

Though they don't play together all the time, Middle child is embarrassed by Youngest child's ability to appeal to the "ladies", and they could not be more different, I am so glad we have them both. I cannot imagine one without the other or us without either of them. It took me awhile to get over my "only child" envy of friends and family, but after this week, I am there.

I am delighted with our "odd" family.

Cat

What's been going on??

Hi friends! I hope this post finds you all doing well and ready for summer. My kids are all done and if we can get the temp up about 10 degrees, we will be living at the pool the rest of the summer. Here's what has been happening here lately:

Husband and I made it thru over two hours of Daughter's 8th grade Award Ceremony. She received several academic awards and was more emotional than I thought she would be. Last she told me, "I am ready to get the heck out of here!" But I think it hit her that she will be entering the big league in a couple months. I know it will hit me the first time I have to go to the High School for Back to School meetings. Now she is on a bus with a bunch of her classmates and her dad on a 22 hour trip to Disney. You could not PAY me to go on a 22 hour bus trip with a bunch of teenagers. Yuck.

I survived being End of Year party planner for Middle child's 4th grade class. It went off without a hitch and I have to say that he had a really great class this year. He has some really great friends. One of which he will spend a week of vacation with, leaving this Friday. It will be weird to not have him around but I think this is a really good experience for him. I am grateful that he is a good enough kid for someone to want to take him on a road trip.

Youngest was voted "Best Personality" in his class. Though I am not at all surprised by that, it makes me weepy with gratefulness that they include him so much in his class. I am sad that his Intervention Teacher is moving to another school and I pray that his new one is as wonderful as she was. You have to have a long fuse when dealing with these kids.

We have been to the pool a couple times all ready and I am a little shocked by the teens that are groping each other so openly. In years past, they at least kept their groping to one part of the grassy area. Not this year, they are all over each other everywhere!! Husband and I have to keep our mouths shut as we pass them because we both have the overwhelming desire to say "You know, you can get pregnant that way" or "Huh, that dude was kissing another girl just a few minutes ago", or my favorite "Eww...that's soo gross!!". Parents, please have the "talk" with your teens before you drop them off for the day. And maybe pop in on them every now and then to see if they are behaving.

I plan on reading a lot this summer, working on house/yard projects and trying to unplug more. I am going to do at least two miles of walking every day and trying to find new lunch ideas for the kids. I know this time will go fast and I want to enjoy every minute. I am trying to be softer with Middle Child and urging Youngest to be more independent. With Daughter, it is just fun to hang out with her and her friends. What a lovely group of young girls she hangs out with. I guess looking at it, all of my kids have really great friends. So do Husband and I.

Life is good.

Cat